Once upon a time our culture put a happy face on everything. We kept problems to ourselves and family issues stayed in the family. When you walked out the door you dressed up and stood tall. You did not complain.
Over the past few years we have started using words like “authentic” and started being honest about how hard life really is, how perfect we really aren’t and how not great we are often doing. And it is great. Some of my favorite bloggers are the ones who are honest and willing to share how they messed up or how bad a day they had. Because I mess up and have bad days too and I love to know I am not alone. We have learned to accept our imperfections, we have shined a light on things like abuse rather than leaving it hidden in families, we have been able to overcome challenges with the help and support of friends and family because we are free to share our needs, fears, struggles. Since I mess up a lot, I love it. I love being able to be honest about my life. I am very, very not perfect and I live a very, very not perfect life. And I am horrible at pretending I am doing good when I am not doing good.
However, recently I have started asking myself if being more honest about the trials has swung too far and we have forgotten the good parts of our life.
When someone asks me how I am doing I can tell them I am great or tell them all my problems. I could say, “I’m good, I burned breakfast this morning, forgot a client meeting and haven’t cleaned my bathrooms in a month but I am surviving.” Or I could say, “I’m doing great, I snuggled extra long with my daughter this morning, caught up on some paper work at the office and put out the fall décor last week so my house is ready for the season.” Both of those stories could be true. In one story I am focused on my failures and in one I am focused on my successes.
My return to work 3 years ago was HARD. But life is a journey, we never stay put in one place so why should our stories stay the same? I still miss homemaking but I am finding work to be enjoyable as I adjust to this new life. I could continue telling the “working is hard” story and it would be true, but working is good too, I like many things about my work. So I have started intentionally telling people I love my job and I even heard myself tell someone recently I love working . And while I could have just as easily told them my job is challenging, I am often not sure I know what I am doing and I wish I was still at home, because those things are also true many days, I am choosing to change my story and be positive. And it is making all the difference.
So, how was your day?